Since Taylor Swift came to market with her catchy tunes, and heart breakingly true lyrics, I’ve joked that she was reading from my diary (along with every other girl in the world).

However, the joke is over and now I’ve been trapped in her album.

With every growing fling I can feel myself being pulled towards another song. And while I enjoy the constant sound track to my love life enough is enough.

I’m tired of being able to predict the outcomes of my courtships, or ex-ships for that matter, already knowing the point when things will start going sour. Seeing the pain points brought to light by the tall blonde are just making me miserable in the beginning (though I was hoping my anti-anxiety pills would let me stop being anxiety girl –  giving me the ability to jump to the worse conclusions possible at a seconds notices – sadly TSwift’s lyrics cause me to put my cape back on).

So I’m asking to be pulled out of my T-Swift funk. I want to leave her album and move on to something more uplifting, something more about  she-woman power and less about the men who I opt to date.

While I love my Swifty-poo I’m just over the stage of endless dating to find the person who might make me feel like they are “Mine.” I’m tired of constantly always getting back together with the wrong person, of burning pictures (plus the fire department isn’t a fan of that) and I’ve exhausted my revenges plots on the men who leave me for someone else (okay I don’t really do that, I just go back to them instead).

What I’m trying to get at is that I’m done with being 22 (for about a year and a half ago now actually) and am ready for a different album to be my ear worm. T-Swift will always have a special place in my heart that, like Adele, is reserved for break ups, but currently with this new stage in my life I need a new album to wander through – preferably one that has nothing to do with men and the lack of relationships I’m hoping to find in the upcoming months.

Sorry girl, but it’s time for me to fly solo for a bit and though I know you wish I would stay, stay, stay, I have to go, go, go.

Perhaps old school Destiny’s Child will be getting a call soon…after all I am a momma who profits dollahs.

One of the questions we all face after completing one stage in our life it’s “what do we want to do next?” Obviously, I’m facing this now. I gave a month’s notice to my job  last week with no potential job  in hand and am heading into the scary and unknown world of unemployment.

What do I want to do next is the question that haunts my nightmares.

There are two things I know, one is that I want to do something that betters people’s lives. Since heart surgeon is out of the question (I have a minor fear of blood) it’s been a trying time to figure out what it is that I want to end up doing. The other thing is I’ve lost my passion, I’ve been hopping from passion to passion for years now and while I continue to come back to writing I’m nervous it’s not strong enough to pull me into a career of that (I see this while writing two books…so maybe I’m just being dumb).

I was talking with a coworker about this the other day though, and she said something that stuck with me “Go with your skills, not your passion.” Think about it? What is more consistent in  people’s lives, your skills. Yes they can always improve, but for the most part you won’t suddenly lose them – knock on wood. But your passion changes with the wind, just yesterday I was contemplating being an astronaut - okay maybe I just considering going on a one way trip to mars.

Basically, what I’m getting at is passion change, skills improve. If you want a job work on making your skills better, become irreplaceable  If you pick a career with the skill set your most proud of you’re bound to enjoy what you’re doing. If you pick something your passionate about now, you may find yourself in a completely different place within the year.

So how do you decide your next move? Look at what you’re good at. Chances are you’re good at it for a reason – and you’ve obviously developed those skills for a reason too – go into something where those skills can shine. Then become irreplaceable, because once you’re irreplaceable it’s hard not to find passion in something.

The face of the “in-crowd.”

First off, congratulations Mike Jeffries you finally have people talking about Abercrombie & Fitch. A brand most ignore in the mall for fear of choking to death on the horrible perfumes that are smothering your clientele.

Personally I have never shopped in your stores. Being someone who was never part of the “in-crowd” (or a size two) had little to do with that, rather the loud booming music, darkened store front, and uninventive clothing are what turned me off.

I prefer the interesting, and lasting, clothing from your competitors H&M and American Eagle – both of which I’m sporting today. Not only do they prove to outlast your clothing (in comparison to my friends, who were not in the “in-crowd” but wore your polos) they also create an inviting atmosphere to shop in.

Maybe it’s just me who likes talking with friends while shopping though? Maybe the “in-crowd” prefers to quietly shop and purchase your overly priced T-Shirts with your name stamped across their chest?

Like I said, never part of the “in-crowd” so I wouldn’t know. Please feel free to fill me in though.

While I hate you as a person I commend your business model. Exclusive is something most strive for, and you’re clearly at the top of your game with it.

However, if you’re going to make a fuss about how you only want attractive people supporting your brand maybe, as the CEO you should work on your face a bit more. The Botox, and botched lip and nose job are making you more of a freak show attraction than a loveable popular kid. Though, no matter how attractive surgery makes you, you (and your clothes) will still be ugly to me.

I quit what I thought was my dream job yesterday.

After struggling for a month and a half to force myself to love both the highs and lows I decided to leave. With a heavy heart I wrote my brief resignation letter and waited until 4:30pm to discuss with my director the next steps moving forward.

It’s not a decision I made lightly. I had been in talks with him since March to find a different place within the company, something that involved more creative duties. But alas (yes I just wrote alas) there was nothing that fit my needs and theirs.

After a job proposal, an internal interview, and over a month and a half since admitting to both myself and the company that I wasn’t happy my journey here is finally over.

I’ve avoided writing about my struggles with this company for a while, but I think it’s important to fully address it now.

As I’ve mentioned in the past I have issues with stress. My body basically doesn’t have the right balance to deal with stressful situations. So when I get into an overloaded stress situation my body shuts down. Which is what happened in late February.

It was terrifying that a job I though was my dream career was basically shutting down my body. Eventually I went to the doctor, after suffering three panic attacks in a month, and was put on anxiety medicine.

The decision to quit at first had a lot to do with my physical health. I was told by countless friends that I couldn’t let a job basically destroy my health. They were right, but I couldn’t admit to myself that I wasn’t able to handle this balancing act.

I felt inadequate, so rather than listening to my body I kept pushing on.

I was so stressed out that I wasn’t remembering to eat. I was exhausted all the time and bitter. Not to mention just plain mean.

I worked late, and resented my job for it. It was impossible to meet the amount of deadlines I was dealing with while still thinking about my health.

I don’t know what woke me up, but I finally realized I didn’t want to live like this. I didn’t want to put my health on the back burner and do something because “it was supposed” to be my dream job.

Sometimes dream jobs don’t work out the way we want them to, and that’s okay. 

When I started this job it had all the elements I’d always wanted, building strategies, dealing with multiple clients, and surrounded by an amazing work environment. But that’s not exactly what it ended up being for my actual position.

So I quit with a months notice to smooth over transitions. I quit with no job offer because that’s what I needed to do, because when we finally see what a job does to us it’s important to fix all of the wrongs before moving on.

And the first wrong I’m fixing is to start putting my health first.

Keep your hand raised for better content and less pictures. That’s what I thought. Photo credit: Reuters

It kills me that many people rely heavily on visual design rather than actual content. With the increase of bloggers, has content taking a turn for the worse? 

The top rated blogs continue to say “good pictures make for good posts,” “create more sharable content with better images”…but shouldn’t we be more concerned about what the content is actually saying, rather than the bonus of having pretty pictures embedded between words.

While I can continue to avoid the wrath of images, I can’t ignore the inevitable.  Images are taking over.

Don’t believe me? Look at what the popular social networks consist of: Instagram? Pinterest? YouTube? Even Facebook mainly consists of LOLcats, meme’s, and annoying pictures your relatives continue to flood your home feed with. We live in a visual world because we’ve all become too lazy to actually read. 

Well, maybe that’s not the entire truth. Maybe I’m just a nerd who is tired of the constant streaming images and who prefers to read informative and fun content more than flipping through a sea of gifs.

Then again, I’m not the majority of people on the Internet. Since the majority decides the turn we will be taking, we should give them what they want.

Okay, so what can we recap?

• You should have photos on your blog.
• You need better photos on your blog.
• You should have original photos on your blog.
• They shouldn’t suck.

You should also have good content, because there are still people like me who prefer to read. So for our sake, please don’t skimp on the content just to share your photo. That’s what Flickr is for.

Just because you’re alone during the month of February doesn’t mean you need to cry in a dark room while downing copious amounts of wine, stolen chocolate, and Adele blaring from your speakers.

Though, that may sound like a great alternative, why not try something out of the Liz Lemon book : Date yourself.

I’ve found myself bouncing from relationship to relationship (if you can even call them that) continually over the past two years. The longest I’ve been alone has probably amounted to a month, at the absolutely most. But even then I still had someone on the back burner.

Before my insane relationship hopper mentality I was always alone, always the third wheel, and always fine with it. But lately I can’t get swept up fast enough, even if I can’t stand the person doing the sweeping. I let it happen because I want to be loved so badly I don’t care who it’s coming from.

Most of this is my fault though; I’m so afraid of being alone that I surround myself with anyone who will be near me.

That isn’t healthy. Which is why I started therapy.

I have good days though, days when I’m like “I can do this, I got this. Who needs someone to love you..”  Then after I have a half conversation with myself, or a love song sneaks on my Kanye Pandora station, I spiral down again and run for the chocolates.

Yes, eating your feelings is completely normal. Suck it Jenny Craig.

Anyway, back to being alone and dating yourself…because that sounds way more awesome than eating an entire bag of chocolates.

It’s important to take time to get to know yourself. Take yourself out for coffee, treat yourself to a glass of wine and a slice of pizza at your favorite place.

While it may sound silly, think of it this way: You spend all of this time getting to know a stranger, learning about their hopes and dreams…but how much time do you spend learning about yourself?

Honestly though, have you ever had a conversation with yourself? Not in a crazy person way, but in a getting to know yourself way. I’m not sure how I can make that not sound crazy, hopefully you just get the point.

It’s important to spend time getting to know yourself, so dust off your favorite dress and take yourself out for a night on the town.

It was a low moment, one of those “Oh-my-god-I’m-going-to-be-alone-forever-pass-the-chocolate” anxiety attacks that drove me back to Okcupid.  But, I have to say, it isn’t terrible this time around.

Maybe it’s because I’m in the city, maybe it’s because I just want to date for the sake of meeting new people. Whatever the reason, I’m enjoying it and am fine.

I’ve been on a few dates so far and slowly working my way into thinking I could seriously date again – the past three weeks have just been for fun (and because I didn’t want to go grocery shopping).

But after a more recent series of dates I’m starting to think I could develop feelings again. Which, after the fall, I was starting to wonder if it was even possible.

Step 1: Give the horse the middle finger - Before you can try again it’s okay to get angry. So get angry at your horse. Whether it’s dating, or an actual horse, it’s okay to be angry or upset.

Step 2: Prepare to ride again - Just because you are getting back on the horse doesn’t mean you need to do it in one swift motion. Take your time, ease into it if you have to. There’s no rush on your side of things, so why not move at your own pace?

Step 3: Practice - Practice makes perfect right? If you’re horse is dating then go on some practice dates. Pick out people who you think would be fun and go from there. There doesn’t need to be a romantic-comedy chemistry right off the bat, just something to get your dating senses tingling.

Step 4: Mount it -  Not in the sexual way. But actually get back on the horse. For me it’s dating seriously, looking for someone to maybe, actually, be in a relationship with. While I don’t know if I’m there yet I’m becoming more open to the idea. For you, maybe it’s finally riding your horse. So take the step, jump up and let ‘er go – maybe just a brisk walk to start though.

On the 27th of December I was offered a new job. It was a job I had applied to in November and had that “AHA” moment, that “that’s what I should be doing” gut reaction. Five minutes into my phone interview I had known that my gut was right.

I had known for two months prior that I was ready to leave my job. There was this dull voice ticking away in the back of my head saying “you’ve done all that you can do,” and over the past weeks it had grown to the point where it was constantly screaming at me.

There’s no point in wasting your time or your employers if you’re done. And by September I was done. I stayed because I wasn’t sure what to do; I had been told by so many people to stay for a year (I made it to 11 months) but I hated feeling like my life was paused. So I did something about it, and if you’re feeling that way you should too.

Step 1: Recognize it’s not working - Do a self-check. Are you happy? Are you feeling challenged? Inspired? Do you enjoy coming to work? While we may not all have the luxury in answering these questions they are still important to think about. If you’re considering quitting you need to weigh the pros and cons heavily before applying to any positions.

Step 2: Ask for help - If something’s wrong at work, speak up. If you don’t feel like you’re being challenge, ask for more challenging work. If there is something that can be changed then try to change it.

Step 3: Realize the changes aren’t working – Sometimes you’re just not meant to be in a line of work, or you’ve outgrown the work you’re doing. That’s okay, but the sooner you realize it the better.

Step 4: Apply to jobs - In this economy it’s stupid to quit with no plan. So make a plan. Either start applying to jobs, line up consulting work, or start your own business (while still employed). Do not quit your job until you have a contract in hand.

Step 5: Digest - Quitting isn’t easy. Especially when either party hasn’t done anything wrong. Sometimes, just like in relationships, it isn’t a good fit. And that’s okay, but it’s better to spot it early.

What advice do you have for people considering a job switch? 

Please note: I’m in no way bashing my previous employer, part of the reason I stayed for as long as I did was because I like the people and enjoyed the industry. 

Rather than thinking of positives, most people are dreading the things that they plan on cutting out of their life. Take for instance my roommate (who shall remain nameless) her new years resolution is three things that she plans on doing less of: Eating less pizza, Making out with less guys, and Drinking less at bars.

Why would anyone want to celebrate doing less of something? 

Not to toot my own horn or anything, but my resolutions are pretty kick ass this year, probably part of the reason I’ll be sticking to them, but mainly because I don’t have to cut anything from my life.

1. Be kind to myself/ Love myself more -half of the female population and I have this annoying little voice in our brains that is constantly putting us down, constantly ensuring our failure, and constantly there. Well this year I’m kicking that voice out. There will be no room for Miss. Negative Nancy in my brain.

2. Say yes to dating – as many of you may know I have a horrible dating track record, though many great stories have come from those awful dates. Most of it is because I block myself, I stand people up, turn down dates, or find any excuse possible to eliminate the chance of success. I.e.; He’s too short, I have a cough, he didn’t graduate, his eyes are too close together, his eyes are too far apart, he’s not Jim Halpert…this list could seriously go on forever. The point is to stop it and become more open to meeting people, after all I’m in a new city…I don’t think I’ll be running out of potential suitors anytime in the near future.

3. Be Healthy – this is how you do the whole “lose weight” bit but be successful. I’m saying I want to be healthy, now be healthy isn’t saying I need to cut out all the delicious treats that I have come to love, no it just means eating more vegetables (which I already love), more fruit (which I do already), and more protein (which will be a struggle) but at least I’m not cutting anything out. OH and exercise more, which I do actually love doing, I just don’t leave time for.

So, those are my resolutions that I will actually be sticking to. Why? Because they are all positive! Are you ready to make a change in your life? Ready to jump ship and actually stick to a resolution? Make a positive change this year and stick to your resolution (for once).

According to many important, fairly crazy, people the world will be ending in exactly eight days.

If you couldn’t tell I’m not on a doomsday prepper. But, hey, if I’m wrong feel free to point it out while you live in the side of a mountain away from the collapse of society.

Anyway, I’ve been doing some research, not because I think that the world will actually end, but because I want to get my facts straight. Turns out, the Mayans, and many South American and Mexican cultures will be celebrating the end of the era by ringing in the beginning of a new one.

That’s right, the people closet to the rumors are actually celebrating, not hiding in their basements or getting ready to commit heinous acts of self violence.

As many sane people would suspect, the mayan calendar is ending – not the world.

December 21st at 12:00am will mark the beginning of a new era, a new chapter, a new year. Not the implosion of our world, though Hollywood and many other beneficiaries of the fearful goldmine would have you believe otherwise.

As we embark in this new chapter it’s important to look back. If this had been the end of the world would you be happy with how your life has turned out? What would you have done differently?

For that matter, why should the end of the world make us want to live our lives better? Why shouldn’t we strive everyday for a better life? Why should we continue to be afraid of talking to the people we want in our lives, but aren’t quite there yet?

I’m guilty of all of the above. I wish I could say I’ve been living like the world was about to end – but I haven’t. I’ve been continuing to live in fear - a different kind of fear, fear of failing to strive for the American norm. But, come december 21st I don’t want to have any regrets moving forward  I’m ready to close this chapter and prepare for the happy, exciting, hopefully full-of-romance chapter that lies ahead in the new year.

Well, the first new year – because if you’ve been counting we get two of them this time around.