9 things you should NEVER say to a Professor

I will admit, sometimes I am not the wisest person in class. I may even sit in the back and begin to nod off. (I know, sorry Professors!) And sometimes I say things that, even looking back on now, make me hang my head in shame. But there are certain things students should just…well…keep quiet about during class, or even in emails or pretty much NEVER, I repeat NEVER, say to a professor. I’ve witnessed multiple accounts of questions, statements, things that just shouldn’t be brought up to anyone. And they were said in class, and said seriously.

9. “The Titanic isn’t real! It’s just a movie” - So you are arguing with your Professor, which is great because Professors welcome the challenge. But in this situation you fail. If you are going to accuse something like…I don’t know, the TITANTIC, of being complete and total fiction, maybe do your research or at least pay attention in class.

8. “I’m still drunk right now!” – Great, I’m really glad you had a fun time last night. But this is a class you paid for (1) and (2) all of the other students in your class paid for it as well and (3) your Professor is actually trying to teach them. No one cares if you are still drunk, especially your Professor. So maybe just leave and find the closest AA meeting.

“My dog ate my homework”/ “My roommate spilled water on my homework and I didn’t have time to get to a printer” - This isn’t high school if you didn’t do your homework, then you didn’t do your homework. Your Professor might be annoyed, but regardless, it will be a zero. And if you make up some lame excuse, it will just aggravate your professor more.

6. “ You never told us when the papers/test was due!”- Hmm…do you have a syllabus? Chances are, anything that is going to be happening this semester (like a test..) will be listed there. And also, this is College…you are responsible for paying attention in class and looking on a syllabus, which is why they give you one, not to just be thrown away after the first class.

5. Professor: “please put you cell phone away” Student “Hold on, it’s really important!“-Okay, this is a big one for me. I don’t understand how people can be so rude! I know you text all the time when you friend is talking to you, which is still rude, but this is your Professor who is trying to TEACH you something. Weird, I know. But regardless this is your money; don’t you want to try to get something out of it? And P.S. in your Professor’s world, the most important thing is what is happening in class right now, so the fact that your best friend just sent you a text about some wild party tonight doesn’t really match up. Put away the cell phone and pick up a pencil.

4. “Is there any way I could get an extension on the paper that was due today, I had a really big test I had to study for in another class” - One of the many unique skills that you can take away from College is the ability to Multi-Task. This usually occurs within the first year of college when you have 3 essays and 2 tests the next day. And waited until the last-minute to start either. Professors assign you work for their class knowing you potentially have 4 other classes to worry about, but keep in mind they still need you to do the work ON TIME…why should you do work for one class but not another?

3.”I know we just took the test yesterday but I was just wondering what my grade was…” -So you know how it took you about an hour and fifteen minutes to take the test? Now that test that you wrote those amazing essays on has to be corrected and read and have all the errors marked. And not just for yours but for everyone in your class and then the other 3 sections. And your professor also would like to live their life and have time to see their family, while you go out and party.

2. “Did I miss anything important in class”- I really hope you wouldn’t say that to a Professor. Please, promise me you won’t. Asking them if you missed anything important is like slapping them in the face then asking for the high lights of class. Everything in class is important according to the professor, if it weren’t, they obviously wouldn’t be teaching it. In the future just ask a student in your class.

1.“I paid a lot of money to take this course, I want an A”- when you go to college it is supposed to be to further your learning/education. Yes, we all want an A (especially since Grad. school is ten times more competitive than 4 years ago) but you need to earn your A. Or at least make you Professor think you are earning your grade, because they sure won’t care that you paid for this class (just like every other student in the class).

A special Thanks/shout out to @annoyedPRprof for some great ideas on how NOT to act in a classroom!